Rj Audition @ Inorbit mall Hyderabad

The poet in me

Deep within, there is a poet in me. He appreciates beauty. He appreciates colors and patterns. He is always filled with a sense of wonder. He lives in dreams. He lives in stories. He lives in fantasies. He likes sitting on a river-side and throwing stones. He gazes at the moon for hours for no reason. He talks to trees. He feeds the birds. He likes to walk long distances. He likes to sit silently and observe others. He doesn't always make sense.

There is also a rationalist in me. He thinks that he knows a lot about the world. He has read a lot. He has a scientific outlook. He knows the molecular structure of water. He knows the real distance between earth and moon. He also knows which color of light has greater wavelength. He always talks logic and sense.

The poet and the rationalist try to be in good terms with each other. In case of a conflict, the poet lets the rationalist win. Because winning is important for the rationalist, not the poet. Being called wise is important for the rationalist, not the poet.

"We" vs "They"

For a fight to happen, there should be two sides. When two individuals fight, it's - Me vs him/her. When two communities fight - it's "We" vs "They". The damage in a fight between two individuals is of the participating individuals only. If an individual gets hurt or killed, he got a probable outcome of his/her own choice. 

However, In "We" vs "They", a group of people fight against another group of people. Quite often, the people who initiate these fights, fight in the name of an identity which is used by many. A lot of people using this identity do not want to fight. Sometimes, they are not even aware of a fight. Their participation in the fight is assumed. So, "We" and "They" are defined in an unfair manner. Those who do not want to fight become victims. They get hurt or killed in a fight they have not picked up by choice. In fact, they become easy targets because they are unarmed and not prepared. This insanity is happening everyday in this world. 

So many riots, so many wars, so many human rights violations !  

Why not keep the "We" large enough and embrace everyone.  "We" and "They" are not fixed anyway. If it's a regional fight, "We" is people living in a small region. If it's a religious fight - "We" is everyone following the religion.  If its a war between countries, "We" is countrymen. May be when aliens will attack us, "We" will include everyone on earth. But, think about it. If there will not be two sides, there will not be a fight.

   

Saibo - from "Shor in the city"

Here is another one of my singing attempts:

Religion should not be your identity.

A series of blasts have happened in BodhGaya, not more than 15kms from my home in Gaya city. Here is what's going on in media and social networking sites:

Modi Followers: Modi is only solution to Islamic extremism. 

Pigvijay Singh: Modi had talked about teaching Nitish a lesson only a day before this blast. Is this 'Saffron terror'?

XYZ Akhtar in a discussion on facebook: Why don't you talk about killing in Maynmar and fake encounter of Muslims? What about the Mecca Masjid and Samjhauta Express blasts? What about Gujrat riots?

ABC Mishra in a discussion on twitter: Why don't you talk about killing of Hindus in Bangladesh and kashmiri Pandits in Kashmir? What about Godhra? And what about the terrorism propagated world over by Muslims? 

And see what Dalai Lama has to say after these blasts:
"There are only few individuals who do such nasty things. We should not give them too much of attention."

Yes, these acts are done by individuals who are minority. Is it so difficult to understand? Nobody needs to accuse other religion or defend his own religion because of these extremists. Statistically speaking, any community will have about 50% women. Do you think they want a world of their own, won over by violence? Nature has not made them so. At least 20 % would be children, too innocent to value any religious identity. And then there would at least be 10% elderly people in 4th phase of their lives. Among the rest, there would be all kind of individuals, most of them aspiring for things normal human beings want in life. Most of them crazy about the same movies, sports, food, and career as individuals of their age in other communities. So, no community is a threat to other community unless these haters who are minorities take over. These haters sell the stupid idea of, we will wipe off the other community or even a whole country and live peacefully.

We need to change the way we look upon the world. The world should not be looked upon as people with different religious identities. The world should be looked upon as people at different levels of evolution. The more evolved ones know "Love", and the not so evolved ones know "Hate". The only solution is to include more people in the first category. As a Muslim, you need to carry the burden of all these terrorists in your group. As a Hindu, you need to carry the burden of equally horrible conspirators and human right violators. But if you assume brotherhood with people who know to "Love", you will have awesome human beings in your group. The group will have diverse human beings, but not the burden of murderers, criminals, racists, bombers and haters.
  

आम अच्छे नहीं लगे

आज जब किराने का सामान खरीदने पड़ोस के बड़े स्टोर में गया तो हमेशा की तरह ज़रूरत से ज़्यादा सामान अपने बास्केट में डाल रहा था. दो टीन किस्म के आम दिख रहे थे. दाम पूछ कर या देख कर लेने की आदत तो अब रही नही. पास ही में एक  माताजी अपनी १०-१२ साल की बेटी के साथ खड़ी उन्ही आमों को देख रही थी. दाम वहाँ लिखे नही थे. उन्होने मुझसे पूछा की ये आम कितने रुपये किलो है. मैने स्टोर की एक कर्मी से पूछ कर उन्हे बता दिया. चालीस रुपये किलो. फिर वापस अपनी बास्केट भरने में लग गया.

काउंटर पर बिल कराने आया तो वही माताजी कतार में मुझसे पीछे आ लगी. हाथ में १० रुपये के कुल चार नोट थे. बास्केट थी नही, एक छोटा प्लास्टिक का थैला था जो शायद वो घर से लेकर आई थी. आजकल प्लास्टिक के थैले के भी तो पैसे लगते हैं. शायद इसलिए. मेरा सामान कुछ ज़्यादा था. दो बड़े प्लास्टिक के थैले भर गये. कुल हज़ार रुपये का बिल आया. मेरे लिए कुछ ज़्यादा नही था. सामान लेकर निकलने को हुआ तो माताजी ने  अपनी छोटी थैली काउंटर पर रखी. उत्सुकतावश देखने लगा. उसमें ३-४ छोटे बैंगन थे, कोई ढाई सौ ग्राम भिंडी , थोड़ी मिर्ची और एक करेला. उनके एक हाथ में १० रुपये के चार नोट थे और दूसरे हाथ में २ आम. वही चालीस रुपये किलो वाले आम. पीछे उनकी बेटी खड़ी थी.  काउंटर का कर्मी एक एक सब्जी का वजन कर रहा था और वो हर बार दाम पूछती जा रही थी. कितने हुए - उन्होने पूछा. काउंटर के कर्मी ने कहा - ३७ रुपये. माताजी ने आपना सामान एक बार और देखा. शायद कुछ कम कर सकें, तो आम आ जाए. पर नही. गुंजाइश नही थी. आम उन्होने किनारे रख दिए और ४० रुपये उसकी तरफ बढ़ा दिए. ३ रुपये जो वापस मिले वो अपनी साड़ी के आँचल में गाँठ बना कर बाँध लिए. दिल भर आया. शायद पहली बार मुझे आम अच्छे नही लग रहे थे.

  

An attempt in singing :)

I am characterless

I am born and brought up in a culture that cares a lot about the character of a woman.  I have researched this for some time and i have a set of case studies to present and you may very well relate to these.

Case study 1:  Mrs Gupta, a small town Aunty to her kitty party friends - “Sharma Ji’s daughter is roaming around with some boy. He drops her to home after coaching classes. I always knew this girl is a loose character.”

Untold Truth:  Back in her 20s, Mrs. Gupta (then Miss Shalini) had a crush on a boy in her college and they used to bunk classes and watch movies in “Prithvi Theater”. The lovers knew that their families would never agree to this relationship and so this always remained an untold love story (there were no hidden cameras in those days). Years later, Miss Shalini married Mr. Prabhakar Gupta and became Mrs Gupta. Now, she is a self-proclaimed character certification officer in her neighbourhood.

Case study 2:  Mr Adarsh  is a perfect son.  He would marry a girl of her mother’s choice. He starts talking to a girl for arrange marriage. One of the questions asked by Mr. Adarsh in a personal interview for the position of wife -  “Have you ever had a boyfriend?” The honest girl replies with a “Yes”.  Mr Adarsh rejects her. He goes to his mom and says “I cannot marry this girl. She is characterless.” 

Untold Truth:  Mr. Adarsh is an NRI software engineer who earns in dollars. Back in his engineering days, he was an avid watcher of porn. He had a huge collection of adult movies and he was proud owner of a hidden porn server in his college.  So far, his profile has 3 short term relationships and a mid-term, 2 years of “casual dating” with a colleague at work. When he first got a chance to visit “
the US of A” on an onsite project, he got addicted to visiting strip clubs and found US to be a land where he could fulfil all his fantasies and attain “Niravana” through a limitless and uncontrolled execution of life. Such unbounded nature of life was a true spiritual liberation for him. But now, when he has to get married, he must marry a chaste woman, a virgin goddess, a girl with ‘samskaras’ who believes in Indian culture.  She must pass an intense character certification test for a profile as dignified and honourable as his wife.

   

Case study 3:  Mr.  RamaGunda Swamy is a self-proclaimed protector of Indian culture. He believes that the influence of western culture is a big threat to our centuries old civilization.  He, with his men often acts as parallel police and raids bars and public gardens to catch hold of lovers.  If they get hold of women who drink alcohol or wear less (in their words, provocative clothes), they act strongly by assaulting these women.  “These characterless women must be punished to protect our culture”, is their argument.

Untold Truth:   Mr RamGunda Swamy was an expert eve-teaser in his college days. In the eve-teaser’s community, his name is still taken in highest regard. He had a record of not sparing even a single girl in his college or neighbourhood back in his days.  One fine day, when his hormones settled down and he attained self-realization, he started thinking about the Indian culture that regards all women at par with mother and sister. So, he inspired the youngsters and created an army (sena) to protect this national identity. It’s a compulsion that he has to assault women for a bigger cause.

Case study 4:  Mr. Raju is very fond of expressing his opinion on social networking sites and other online public forums.  Whenever, he watches a video like Sunny Leone in Jism or Rekha in Kamasutra or some bold scene of an Indian actress, it disturbs him to the extent of causing some psychological imbalance. Immediately he expresses his opinion. “Such a characterless whore! Why does she have to defame our culture?”

Untold Truth:  Mr Raju has a genuine curiosity about women in body business. As part of his experiments and attempts to demystify this aspect of life, he has often been to women in this profession. In other words, he is often Devdas to a Paro. In fact, a significant amount of his salary is spent in these experiments. That’s why; he claims to know a characterless woman better than anyone else.

There are numerous such examples and you only have to look around to find them.  Giving character certificate to a woman is a very common practice in this country. And once a question about her character is well-raised, a comment or abuse or even sexual assault is justified by a self-proclaimed certifier.

There is a lot of anger and pain in the air due to the recent inhuman incident that has happened in Delhi.  Lot of people want death penalty for assaulters. A lot of us want them be stoned in public in a Taliban like manner.  This horrendous act is something that definitely leads us to think. But unfortunately, all this thinking is outward.  Next time, when you feel like giving character certificate to a woman, please ask yourself a question, “Am I someone of such high character, a pure soul, that I can give a character certificate to someone else?”

And if everyone is fallible like you and me, why have this business of judging the character of others? Stop this character nonsense. Because of this societal perception, a rape victim in India suffers more than anywhere else. She feels more dishonored than needed when it’s not her fault.

To hell with this hypocrisy.  I AM as CHARACTERLESS as anyone else in this world. And I am not good enough to hold myself higher than anyone in this world in terms of character.  I can only quote Kabirdas,

“Bura jo dekhan main chala, bura na milya koi,

Jo mann dekha aapna, mujh sa bura na koi”

Our Story

This poem has been written by my creative better half :)
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We met through a friend, at Animesh's house.
He was eating maggie, and I was obviously loud.

We din't talk much at that time.
But I liked his nature, and he perhaps liked mine :P

Met in more group outings, it was some time well spent.
There seemed to be some connection between us, which both of us felt.

Soon, we were looking for reasons to meet.
Asking commom friends for partying, or giving them a treat.

Slowly started, talking over phone, without specific reasons.
At times, it was sharing happiness, at others random discussions.

Friends were teasing, pulling our legs, as and when they got chance.
We didn't care much and enjoyed our friendship, or the so called romance.

We cared, we fought, we waited, we supported, wanted to be together all the
time.
We had found something precious, that we didn't bother to define.

We had something in comon, something different in choice.
But the feeling of being together, we always rejoiced.

Finally he said it, in a poem well composed.
And it still did not click me, that I was being proposed.

Sweet moments of fun together, rolled again in front of my eyes.
My answer was a certain yes, didn't even think twice.

We could not finish our meal, that we ordered for the night.
Still we paid a high tip to the waitor, for this defining moment of our
life.

It has been a special journey, since then till now.
With the blessings of our parents, we are going to exchange our vows.

Hope we'll have many more such moments, as we sail through in time.
Right now, love the feeling, that I'll be his, and he'll be mine :)

The Proposal (2009)

Anyone in love may use this poem, but should not modify, redistribute or claim ownership. The content is a sole propreitery of the author :)
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When i see the moon,
It's brighter than ever.
A voice so sweet,
pleases me like never.
I see a dream,
Can rest with forever.

When i close my eyes,
I see an image not so clear.
I try to find out what it is?
Vodka, rum or beer?

The birds come to me and say,
You are an idiot, a joker.
It's such a wonderful gift you fool,
And it happens so rare.

As i kick my brain cells harder,
It confuses me even more.
But my heart knows the answer,
And that too so sure.

It's love in my eyes,
As you can see.
All i ask now is,
Do you love me?

I am getting married !!

Once upon a time, there was a boy who was a total freak, a hardcore rationalist and an unsorted egoist. And then he met a girl who was divinely innocent, chirpy, always crafting her dreams and fantasies and still wise deep within.

They became friends and as time passed by, they felt some mutation happening to both of them . They found themselves happier than usual in each other's company. The boy proposed the girl and asked for a lifetime of togetherness. And now, they are getting married. :) Save the date ! And grace us with your presence.

Lost

The beauty of the world around,
Freedom and the nature unbound.
Serenity and the peace within,
Are Lost, in the race to Win.

Losing is a sin, a deadly crime,
So much to do in such less time
The glittering world turning me blind,
I am lost, in the illusions of mind.

All faces look the same,
No side to take in the game.
Chaos and the voices so loud,
I am lost, in a small crowd.

The craving for love and care,
Deep impressions lying everywhere;
Solving the puzzles,connecting the dots,
I am lost, in the ocean of thoughts.

From one generation to another

My grand-father had passed away when my father was only ten years old. I have grown up hearing stories of how my grand-mother raised four of her kids (two daughters younger to my father) with all the grace and dignity. She sold her jewels to purchase farms which we still possess. My father and uncle (four years elder to my father) had to travel around twenty kilometers on feet every day to their school and back. They would give tuitions, work in the farms and even make and sell paper bags to support the family. We being Brahmins, my father would conduct pooja during wedding season. They had seen depravity, poverty and hardship to the extent that sometimes they had to bother about their daily meals. It would always fill me with a sense of pride when I would hear these stories. I would ask my grand-mother and my father about all these stories. There were villains in these stories and I would hate them. There were scenes and conversations in these stories that I would like to hear again and again. All of this was no less than a Bollywood melodrama to me.


There were few interesting incidents that are my favorites. My father had to go for an interview for a job in banking services. Nationalized banks at that time were the most coveted government jobs and a doorway to good life and social status. My father (19 and still an undergraduate student) and uncle (23) had both made it in the written exam and had to go to Patna for interviews. They did not have decent attire so that they could look presentable in an interview. This was an India of late 70s or early 80s, still British enough to care for these things. So, they tried to borrow clothes from friends and relatives. Till the last moment, my father did not get a shoe. And guess what, he went for the interview in a “hawai chappal”. At 19, he looked younger than his age and the interview panel was surprised. As soon as he entered the room, the head of the panel greeted him as “Welcome my little child, why do you want to enter a job at such an early age”? He was asked about Newton’s laws of motion, sanskrit shlokas, poetry and General knowledge. There is more to the story. The results would not be out for a year or so and all hopes were tied to it. My great grandfather had sponsored the application form for this particular exam and it was a big deal. My father could not afford giving too many exams too. He went to Calcutta just to enquire about the results from Banking Service Recruitment Board office. In those days, you would read the newspaper every day for news like job result and the wait could go as long as few years. He was disappointed by some clerk in that office who falsely told him that he has not made it. With heavy heart, he came back. And after few months, when he was sitting at somebody else’s place in the village, the local postman surprised him by handing over him his appointment letter which had asked him to join only few days later. At the time of joining, the bank needed some deposit as caution money. He did not have the money and could not arrange for it till the joining date. The bank manager would not let him join quoting rules. He was saddened and sat on a bench in the bank. There was another gentleman who was sitting on the same bench and he saw him disheartened and sad. He was an officer who had got transferred to this branch and was going to take over the charge as manager replacing the previous one. He asked him to sit for another hour till he took over the role, and then called him up and completed his joining process without any caution deposit.

And this is how life changed for him - from 20 kilometer walks to motor-cycle, from old clothes to nice attire and from nights with empty stomach to gulab Jamun and rasgulla. Many witness such dramatic shifts in our lives, but sometimes it’s so overwhelming that you feel the divine grace falling upon you in a limitless way.

I have seen and observed shifts in my life as well – from trains to airplanes, from stitched clothes to branded wears and from cycle to car. I would say that one whole generation like me has seen a shift in standards of living. The protagonist in a Bollywood movie has changed from a middle class, small-town unemployed graduate who has a sick mother and a younger sister (eligible to be married) to a careless, individualistic big city boy who is confused and entangled in on and off relationships and is inventing new definitions of freedom in his ways of living.

There is no doubt that we are a wealthier generation. But are we a happier generation? I am not trying to pass a judgment here. It’s debatable. All, I am trying to say is that the relative highs and lows in our lives could pretty much be the same. Let’s look at some other examples from my story -
My village is on the bank of a river and my father learnt swimming (he would swim in wells and ponds as well) in his early childhood while I learnt it only when I grew up. He would spend hours in the river and in the farms and playing outdoor games. I spent hours watching TV and playing video games. His parties would have roasted potatoes, rice and sabji and seasonal fruits like melons straight from the farm. Mine would have Pizzas. He would tune in at a particular time to a radio, and I would play the music in my phone anytime and anywhere. He would go to the temple every day to pour milk on Shivlingam, I would meditate now and then (art of living kind of courses) to achieve some peace of mind and release my toxins.


Once I walked the ten kilometer stretch my father used to walk to his school. Till then, I used to pity him. But my view changed. It was not that bad either. It was healthy and fun walking through those green paddy fields with moist and cool soil that would massage your legs if you walk bare foot. In fact, I carve for a lot of these experiences now. Many of us do. We go on treks where we pass through the farms and the rivers and experience the relaxation that nature fills in us. To bring those experiences home, we go to the so called natural spas.


I have a lot of good things about my life as well and my father has also moved on to a Facebook age (and he loves it). But, when it comes to life and about making it happier and better, it’s not about what time or era we live in. It’s about how our inner space and the experiences within are manifesting.

The Pudin-Hara analogy

There are a lot of funny things about my school, but recently I remembered something that I think many of us can relate to. If anyone used to fall sick during school hours, there would only be two remedies – Iodex or Pudin-Hara. Now you may have had Crocin or Disprin as well, but that does not alter or lessen the intensity of my analogy. The very fact that we used to have very few options and whosoever was your savior, either your class teacher or sports teacher, tried to solve any goddamn fever or pain with the same set of medicines holds true. He had broad classification of the problems. Muscle pain or headache – use Iodex. Any internal problem – Pudin Hara.

I am not questioning their intention or something. I am just looking at how many different options I’ve been given by whosoever managed me so far during different phases of my life for 24 years. An average human being is always managed by someone. First by his parents, then his teachers, then may be by a boss (a formal manager at work). If you are a human being living in a normal socio-economic setup, somebody always has a vested interest in managing you. A lot of times, it’s an obligation to pick up one of the remedies or solutions that this person offers you. He mostly uses his own judgment and experience of life in giving you these options. But do you ever cry foul? Like Hey! You did not give me enough choices. You do not understand my problem so well or maybe you are not a good manager and I know what’s best for me.

It may sound clichéd, but most of the middle class parents want their kids to be doctor or engineer (MBA is the latest fashion). So, they try to nurture their interest and inspire their actions on those lines. A lot of times they screw up really bad pushing the child to feel like a loser in life when his potential could have been used in numerous other better ways. Isn’t it just another example of bad management? Isn’t it something where one diagnosed the case wrong, like used Crocin to treat pneumonia and it turned disastrous?

As a grown up, I feel it’s a common management practice or rather a common management screw-up. I term this as “The Pudin Hara Analogy”. Think about it. Say, to a sample of 100 sick people suffering from different ailments, I give Pudin Hara. After 24 hours, 10 of them felt a lot better (may be they had indigestion), 30 of them felt well (may be because they took good rest and it’s not because of the pill), 40 of them did not feel much difference, and 20 of them got further sicker. Now, I am a biased person and I publish an analysis of the statistics as below:
• 10 % of the patients who adopted the precautions and advices regarding usage of the pill well, showed exceptional results.
• 70% showed average results
• 20% of the patients went bad because they did not use the pill well.

Now, look at what happens to us in schools and colleges. All of us are given the same course structure. 20% of us who fail have not studied the subjects well or have not worked hard enough. Our teachers, professors or the system itself that manages it all, boasts success quoting the top 10%. Those who failed must go through same courses again because it’s some inherent problem in them and not the system. The bottom lot is made to believe that the problem is on their part. They do not even realize that they were given the wrong treatment at the first place. Like, they were given “Pudin-hara” for a headache and now when the pain is worse, they are being forced to take the same pill again.

Look at what happens to us in corporate offices. Your manager is a wise man and his success and growth is tied to your performance. He wants you to adopt all the practices that he ever used to reach height. A lot of times, he actually tries to morph you into another copy of himself. Those of his reports, who exceeded expectations, followed his teachings well. Those who underperformed are not hard-working and need to be managed out.

The very fact that individuals are all unique and need customized solutions and treatments is not well understood in this world. Humans are emotional beings and cannot be treated in an assembly line. They are so unique that you need unique methods to harness their potential. So, if you are managing someone’s career as a manager or a father, try having better means than “Only Pudin-Hara”. And if you are a wise man, who can understand his own problems and listen to his instincts, do not settle at “Only Pudin-Hara”.

Rap for Jassi

This is rap written by me for my best friend Jassi. Dude ! you found space on my blog too :)
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Yeah, Listen up guys to the story;
about a cool friend named Jassi.

A geek,a freak and a friend in need,
a champ and a hero,so well agreed
like a bee on the flower,
And a monkey on the tower,
he's been the best, at what he did.

you better never play tricks,
coz he always got the fix,
like Neo from Matrix,
He's the army and "The One",
for a code unrun
And a project never done,
he's the man to do it right,
lot of archers, lot of knights;
All courage and no fright.

Feared for his locks
that give you real shock
his slams are not approved
and his theories never proved
He's a man with the might.
moves robos in the night
can speed up like light,
On his old red bike,

Yeah, listen up guys to the story;
about the cool dude named Jassi.

Let's do it for no reason

I have been seeking answers to a lot of questions; the questions which I have been queuing up in my mind ever since I was a child, the questions which everyone is afraid of asking because asking them is sheer disobedience to our belief-system. Nobody gave me anything except ill-fabricated and illogical answers to these questions which I could discard through minutes of reasoning. I mean, how come so many things are unexplained in our belief-systems/religions and we are still following them like unthinking mass. It seems that we are fearful of truth and nobody wants to talk about them.

Our prophets in the past who were on a noble mission to put some order in this world have written code of conduct for almost everything. But why should we obey them? Why should we even worship God? Isn’t the story of heaven and hell meant to induce fear in our minds so that we can do the so called right things instead of actually adopting them out of some inner awareness? Am I not socially programmed (hard-coded) to be something in this world? Isn’t God a generic answer to all the questions which are unanswered to us? Why does Hindu mythology reference Himalaya, but not Andes, Atlas or Alps or any other mountain range on some other planet? Similarly, why do other mythological stories relate only to their respective geographical origins? If God showers his blessings to only those who worship him, isn’t he having a desire to be respected for his might which in no way is a Godly trait? Why doesn’t someone write the mythology about next generation of Gods? Don’t they reproduce now? How come son of Greek Gods did not have a son again and there is no son of “Ganesh” and no father of “Shiva”? If God created this world, it should be perfect, then why is it evolving? Why aren’t sex (method to create life) and death (the end of life) talked about as divine? Why does society make rules and demand obedience? What is the aim of Life/existence? Why do we chant mantras the meaning of which we do not know? What consequence will an action have on my future? What is future? Is it pre-determined or I have to design it? If it is pre-determined, who determined it? Is it God? If there is no God, what explains creation? Is evolution a contradictory theory to God or complimentary?

Try to reason them all and you have started a quest, quest for truth, quest for enlightenment. Soon, you will fall into a closed loop of contradictions. You will contradict a set of beliefs and deduce some logical answers to your questions. Now, you develop a new set of beliefs with these newly founded answers. You contradict these beliefs again by reasoning out through another set of observations. To get out of this loop is the biggest challenge in the path to enlightenment. After sometime, you figure out that the answers to some of these deeper questions cannot be figured out through logical reasoning of the mind. The more you try to be logical, the more you get confused and devoid of happiness. Finding out logic in every single occurrence in this universe makes life miserable. Why is a child so happy? He does not need a reason. He does not want occurrences to be explained by logic. And try to look at the scenario vice-versa. There is no logical mind which is telling him that kicking a stone by the side of road is happiness or running after butterflies is joy. Joy is so intrinsic to him that actions follow. There is no attempt to put an order. Why can’t we be the child and why we can’t we be happy? Look at the things around you which can make you happy. Music does not come out of reasoning. It is discovered from some unknown source in the universe. No form of art comes out of reasoning. But they all make you happy.

I have been logical enough to compromise with happiness for so long. But I somehow understand the path to unlimited happiness now. Happiness and enlightenment are all intrinsic to us. Enlightenment is a serendipity which is attained in sheer emptiness of mind. All we have to do is achieve emptiness, a state of no-mind. But why then there have been only few enlightened people in this world? Because to achieve this state of no-mind is not easy in this world. We do not realize that nothing in this world should be taken seriously. We should try to laugh at every single occurrence in this universe. At the least, we should try to shut off the logical mind for some time and experience the joy of being an observer in this world. Let’s do it for no reason.

A Train to Catch

“Hey! I am hungry; I got to go for a Pizza. “, said Jassi at around 4:30 PM.
“Where are the other guys? Aren’t we getting late? I mean we have a train to catch at 6:30.” I expressed my concern.
“Yash and Samira are ready and waiting for us. You call Jitu and remind him for he will take another half an hour with his usual “getting-late” habit.” Jassi replied.
It was a messed up day in office for almost all of us. Jassi had worked the whole of last night to meet some terrible deadline.
“I am going to the Dominoes across the road. You guys reach there and we’ll get auto-rickshaws.”He said.


Another half an hour and we were down on road with our luggage well set on top of our backs. Jitu had arrived with Ronak late by only 15 minutes. Jassi had got his Pizza packed by now. Within all our efforts of hiring rickshaws for railway station and not overpaying them at the same time, we couldn’t do better than 5:45.
“It’s just 45 more minutes. How the hell do you think we’ll make it given so much of traffic on road?” I asked. “Chill man... I think we’ll make it in time.” replied Jitu.
“Don’t worry Saab! It takes only 30 minutes to reach Nampally” said our rickshaw driver with a degree of confidence.


The six of us started in two rickshaws for the railway station. But a real time problem seldom solves in best time. Thirty minutes wasn’t even the average. Suddenly, it started raining with heavy winds flowing opposite to our direction. The weather would have definitely been fun at any other occasion. But now, it was a real pain for us and the driver.
“We can’t make it to Hyderabad railway station now. It’s bloody impossible. Let’s try to catch it in Secunderabad. It takes another half an hour for the train to reach there.” I said to Jitu and Ronak who were with me in the rickshaw.
“Sounds good, let’s ask others to do the same.” replied Jitu.
In a matter of moments I was busy calling Jassi in the other Rickshaw.

“We need to head for Secunderabad”, I said to Jassi “Let’s instruct the driver to take the next left”
Isn’t it that sometimes the constants in our poorly framed equations turn out to be variables resulting into a totally wrong calculation? We instructed our driver to take the next left for Secunderabad but he refused.
“Saab, you negotiated for Nampally. I’ll take you to Nampally only” said the driver in a firm voice.
“We will pay you whatever you want but take us to Secunderabad railway station” said an arrogant and over-confident me.
“No Saab, I’ll drop you to Nampally only.” He replied and repeated the same in all my attempts to appease him. A mixed feeling of anger and frustration gripped me. Jassi’s rickshaw had already taken the left turn to Secunderabad and it wasn’t wise for us anymore to convince our driver. He had already driven too far along the first route. But ten more minutes of drive filled some air of relaxation into my lungs.
“We kicked our brain cells for free.” I thought.. “We’ll reach well in time. We are just 3-4 KMs short and we still have 15 minutes”


It couldn’t believe my luck when all of a sudden our auto-rickshaw stopped with a gentle sound. It did not take us much time to guess that it had given up. We could no more bet upon it. I felt like murdering the rickshaw driver but somehow acted civilized. But I could feel the rise of adrenaline in my blood.
It’s just 12 more minutes.” said one of us.


Another hunt for a rickshaw started. No Luck! Every rickshaw seemed to be either full or not willing to earn. I thought of asking the status of the other half of us and called Jassi.
“Hey Jassi, I am sorry but our rickshaw has stopped in between and we are figuring out alternatives to reach in time. You go ahead.” I said as soon as I got my call connected.
“Our Rickshaw has stopped too. I am pushing in an attempt to restart it. I guess we’ll have to change it too.” He replied with a surge of laughter. I was sure he would not joke at this moment. I felt puzzled at the way we were getting fetched into a sequence of unlucky events.
“We’ll still try to make it. Just try to reach somehow” I replied.
Suddenly a voice from behind came. “We have got another rickshaw. Let’s go.” It was Ronak.


Another attempt to defy time started. We had exact seven minutes and the driver was the most confident guy for his position. He was driving really well and taking all the short-cuts he could to make us reach just in time.
“We are less than a kilometre from here sir”, he said after driving really fast for about five minutes. Another 5 minutes left. And suddenly his rickshaw stopped.
“What happened?” asked an anxious and desperate me.
“The Petrol is over sir. I have lost the key to the petrol tank and can’t get it filled.” He replied.
“Let’s get another rickshaw” I reacted fast and prompt. We had no time to think. The clock in my cell-phone showed 6:25.


We couldn’t find one single rickshaw or taxi around and our luck was very obvious by now. I requested one of the trolley-auto-rickshaw’s to help us reach the station, but all in vein.
We needed a miracle! A Goddamn miracle!
Suddenly a saviour came in the form of a person who was having his auto-rickshaw parked in a garage to get it serviced. But he realized the need and somehow got his vehicle started and running for us. Two minutes left and we had no other choice than to bet upon him. With some serious limitations of not being able to change the gears well, he made us reach the parking of Hyderabad railway station.
“That is it.. We are here.. Let’s run now” I shouted. The three of us ran without uttering anything next.
We entered the station and figured out the platform number. A bridge to cross and we were there.
“That’s our train on the other side”, I chuckled.


But how could things be so simple for us next. It was 6:32 already. A blow of signal and the train started. It was like we could see our much deserved award being denied to us. I ran as fast as I could, stepped down the over-bridge and jumped into a fairly accelerated train. Wow! It was so relaxing to be in. I had done it.
“But wait a minute,.”, I said to myself..“Where are the other two guys?” I looked behind from the door and they had given up after running for a while. I couldn’t let this happen. The train had to stop. An impulse aroused and in the very next moment I pulled the chain. I never knew it was so simple. Just a mild pull and then a large sound of some vacuum-cut and the train stopped. The passengers sitting in the compartment looked at me in wild amusement and a bunch of policemen ran towards the coach. I immediately left the coach and went to the last connected coach I could go to in opposite direction. I did not want to trap myself into another round of trouble by getting caught next. I had made the train stop for nearly five minutes and I knew the other two would have boarded comfortably.

My cell-phone rang next. It was Jitu. “Hey, where are you? We have boarded the train. Come to S-9. You have the ticket with you.” He said.
I breathed in some more fresh air and said, “You stay there. I am coming. Let me check how well Jassi’s half is doing for Secunderabad”. I cut the phone without listening to Jitu next and called up Jassi. He was not picking up the phone.
“Pick up the phone damn it! I need to know where you are. You do not catch the train at Secunderabad, and we are screwed”. No response. My phone rang again.
“Hey, where are you? I need you here urgently.” Jitu said from the other side as I picked it up.
“Just coming”, I replied.
I started looking for Jitu and Ronak as I passed through the inter-connected sleeper coaches one by one.
“Here he is. But why the hell is he accompanied by these cops?”. It wasn’t for some nice reason for sure. For a moment I thought that they had somehow figured out my pulling the chain and were waiting for me.
“Where were you? These guys are accusing me of having pulled the chain. I can’t believe this.” Jitu was sounding very upset.


So, a new story got framed now. The cops caught my friends for the simple reason that they were the only ones boarding the train when the chain was pulled and they should have the explanation. But the good thing was that neither the cops nor the two of my friends had guessed it so far that it was me who had pulled the chain. My inner self and respect for the law started pushing me for a confession.
“Confess your deed and pay the fine. Be a responsible citizen. This is the way to go.” I was repeating this aloud to myself.
Meanwhile, Jitu was arguing really bad with the cops for the simple reason that he was not guilty and still being charged.
“Give me the proof for your accusation or get someone to testify. If you are not able to prove it was me, I’ll show you next. Lemme have a look at your badge – B.N. Raju. I remember your name very well.” He sounded really pissed off as he spoke.


“Testify! What if he takes us all to the same compartment in which I had pulled the chain and the passengers sitting their identify me.” The whole scene was not getting driven in the right direction. Jitu had unknowingly misbehaved with the cops and the matter was out of our hands now. It’s not that the cops believed us after all this. One of the cops was constantly talking on his walkie-talkie device to some senior officer in Telugu. We sat quite all this while.
He broke the silence after a while, “You want to say anything next, say it to our ACP. He is waiting for you at Secunderabad railway station.” My face turned pale. Things would have been really better if I would have confessed earlier and given away the fine.


My phone was ringing. It was Yash now. “Ya , Where are you?” I asked.
“Where are you? How long will it take the train to reach Secunderabad? Our driver is saying that it will take another half an hour for us to reach there. I think we are not going to make it” She sounded tensed.
“We have boarded the train. But did you say half an hour. We are about to reach in 5 minutes. ” I said. “I am sorry then. We are not getting the train.” She replied.
I cut the phone and sat dumb. “We are not going without them.” I said to Jitu “Let’s get off at Secunderabad.” There couldn’t be a more troublesome day for us. We still had to deal with the cops next. Jitu started riding them really bad.
“Let me meet your ACP and I’ll tell him. You have troubled innocent people. We have not done anything like pulling the chain and we are not frightened. You hear that,, you irresponsible cops !! We have done nothing and we are not frightened.” Jitu was loud and angry. I had no other option than to shut my mouth up. I couldn’t be as confident as he was. But I had to try something.


“What do you want from us? Is it the money?” I asked the cops in a deliberate attempt to know their intentions next.
“Pay the challan and we’ll leave you” one of them said.
“We are not paying you a rupee. We are meeting your ACP. Take us to him” Jitu shouted.
The cops really started losing their grip now. Jitu was vibrating truth in his behaviour which could not be acted otherwise. On the other hand, I was totally robbed by fear. It was safe for me not to speak and let him deal with the matter. What if somehow the true story comes up now? We still had to deal with a senior cop and who knows how well we will do there. Secunderabad station had arrived and the train had stopped. We stepped down to the platform from the coach. One of the cops went to look around for his senior leaving three of us with the other one.

“We are going to the AC coach as we have our reservation there. Where is your ACP?” I asked.
“He is coming.” The cop replied.
“Will he come after we miss our train? We are going to the AC coach.” said Jitu, his voice marked by anger.
“Ok,, one of you stay here and others go. We’ll follow you there.” said the cop. It set me relaxed for a while.
“Let Ronak stay”, I said. Me and Jitu took the entire luggage and walked towards the AC coach.


“Here it is - B1.” said Jitu. The coach was right in front of the main entrance of the railway station at platform no. 1. Jassi, Yash and Samira were nowhere to be seen. The train was about to signal when we saw a “Sardaar” rushing towards me with heavy luggage in his hands.
“It’s Jassi.” I couldn’t feel better without shouting it loud.
“Let’s get in. Where is B1.” He said as he arrived almost running to me.
“It’s right here in front of us” I said and the five of us took no time to board the train next.
“Where is Ronak?” asked Yash.
“He probably is in some sleeper coach with the cops. They are charging us for having pulled the chain.” I replied.
“Have you pulled the chain” asked Samira, her voice marked by surprise.
“No, we have not.” I replied. I did not want everyone sitting nearby to know it.
“This is ridiculous. How can they do this.” She said.


I took Jitu aside next and told him the truth and asked him to instruct Ronak to pay the challan and let the matter go. He called Ronak who was equally adamant on the other side and instructed him to settle the matter by paying something to the cops.
And this is how Ronak settled it. He said to the cops, “We have not pulled the chain. But since you are troubling us, and you have to reply with a challan to your senior, I am paying you the money. Take it but don’t cut it in my name. Cut it on some random name.”
The cops were very pleased to do the same. They escorted Ronak with due respect to the AC coach next. It was a moment of relief for all of us.


“Where is the Pizza I got packed” asked Jassi in a mood to change the topic.
It’s here with me”, replied Jitu and we attacked the Pizza like anything. What had happened in last one hour was the experience of a lifetime for us. And we had not missed the train.

Bachna Ae Haseeno

Remember the great classic of the 70s - “Choti si Baat”. A young and naive lover does not know how to express his feelings to a girl. He follows her for days without achieving even an introduction or a seat next to her in a public bus. He is a complete looser until he goes to a “Colonel Julius Nagendranath Wilfred Singh” who has some deep wisdom of his age to pass on to his disciple... and guess what, this brings fortune to our character and he is able to win the war of love and we witness a “Happy Ending”.

Let’s turn the page to today and we witness yet another young and fresh lover who carries some “killer instinct” and is never tired of wooing as many girls as possible. “Bachna Ae Haseeno” is a story which ideally mirrors the manners of modern metro youth which is so casually driven when it comes to relationships. Our protagonist is a perfect six-foot, six-packed young man who has all the feathers in his cap to make him an ideal bachelor. And unlike our 70s story, he has got some unborrowed and inherent art of seduction with which he swings in love with women all the time. Though our story ends up with our character realizing the essence of true love and giving up his dignified “Casanova” status, this does not always find a mapping in a modern urban lifestyle.

Honestly speaking, who doesn’t want to be a character like the one in “Bachna Ae Haseeno”? Indian men were never so serious about having a six-pack or getting branded wears or for that matter going to a gym. They never had such a strong concern for appearance and such a high disposable income to spend on lifestyle. The dictionary was never richer with terms like “Metrosexual” and “Retrosexual” and never were “hot” and “cool” spoken of in the same sense. Having a girlfriend is a social statement these days and you simply don’t want to be outcast. And believe me things were never this simpler. You do not strictly have to fall in love to have a girlfriend. It’s no more an intractable problem and you have got some deterministic algorithms – some as simple as asking a girl out to the nearest McDonalds or Pizza Hut. And did you get worried about signing up some commitments? Don’t you worry! You can easily get away in the end with a statement like - “I do not know the reason but somehow I have lost feelings for you” - like you have had some feeling before and you are so sorry to say that. Or something like - “I think I should be honest to confess that I am no more loyal to you. You deserve someone better than me.” Your honesty will pay and you will break apart to flaunt your ex-girlfriend count. And it’s statistically proven that this has no negative impact upon your candidature for the next girl.

One of my girl friends wanted me to learn some lesson from the movie which coincidently had the actor working for Microsoft. Though a seriously working guy at Microsoft barely gets so much of free time to move around looking for girls, I would definitely miss no chance of doing so if I have all the luck. :P ........ So here is the lesson that I learnt - "You should flirt with as many girls as possible but wait for the final call until you get someone like “Deepika”. :) " Keep Moving till then.......

@ the speed of Thought

“To function in the digital age, we should develop a new digital infrastructure. It should be like the human nervous system. Organizations need to have that same kind of nervous system--the ability to run smoothly and efficiently, to respond quickly to emergencies and opportunities, to quickly get valuable information to the people who need it, the ability to quickly make decisions.”
This is an extract from the book “Business @the speed of Thought” written by Mr. Bill Gates, chairman of Microsoft and one of the great pioneers of this century. In this book he has envisaged a world where digital tools will be used to reinvent the way we work and where information flow will be as fast as thought in a human being. With the proven might of internet and the concept of digital money, we are very well able to appreciate his vision and foresightedness.

Gone are the days when slow and steady used to win the race. And if you are so impressed by the rabbit-tortoise tale, let’s sign a bet and we’ll have a race again. Believe me, the rabbit will not be a fool to sleep this time. In fact he won’t even think of the tortoise being somewhere in the race. He will run even faster to beat his own previously set record. So, this is the new story my friend. Even those who are at the top are busy competing with themselves and setting better and finer records. They are expeditious and obsessed with “Speed” like Mr. Gates.

The theory was very pleasing to my mind and I got completely overwhelmed. I do not know whether I exhibited a keen discernment to the theory or not but I too started fantasizing speed. How cool would it be if according to Einstein’s theory of relativity we could convert ourselves to energy, travel at the speed of light and then again convert ourselves to the same mass? In practically no time, we could travel anywhere on this earth. But wait a minute… Speed of thought is a higher metric than the speed of light. We can reach the planets millions of light-year away in a matter of second with the speed of thought. And it’s not just this definition of speed that we are talking of. Speed is an evaluation parameter associated with most of the events around us. It has always been an ardent desire of the human race to defy time and one of the proposed solutions is “Speed” – the effective utilization of each unit of it. The world is not just about achieving something; it’s about achieving something fast. It’s not just about getting things done; it’s about getting things done fast. And look, we have started realizing our desires come true. We can do so many things at the click of a mouse.

After so blissfully attaining this enlightenment, I started having problem with so many things around me which were slow, dull and dumb and which in my honest opinion did not deserve to be where they were. I mean, how could I travel eight kilometers from my home to Microsoft campus in a “Vikram” which looked to me like an excellent museum quality material? And how could it take a train 40 hours (best case) to make me reach my hometown which is good enough time for Britney Spears to last a marriage. And how could downloading with a BSNL connection be so slow? And how could trains be so late and traffic is so busy? Don’t they have any respect for time? Can’t they just “speed up” to meet the standards?

On Thursday, Feb 14, 2008, when roses and cards were abounding all around with no one for me to give one to, when couples were flaunting their mutual bliss in dimly-lit restaurants, when love-birds were holding hands and showing affection in parks and by the lake-side on the eve of “Valentine Day” … I received a mail which was a reply to my progress report to my senior team lead. It read “The target end date was 5th Feb. It’s slipped by almost 7 days. Moving Forward, I would like to see upfront notification if there is any slippage in task” ….. And I felt like replying …..Come on! You got to be kidding me. How can you be so serious? It’s just 7 days. I didn’t use to finish my projects till one night before my demo in college days and never did it happen that I was asked for one single explanation. And it’s not that I was sleeping all this time or playing soccer or watching movies like I used to do at IIIT, my beloved college. I just couldn’t “speed-up”. Oh …. Stop! Did I mention “speed”?

This too is “RACISM”.

Today accidently enough while checking out India’s score against SriLanka, I tuned in to one of the news channels which was staging a debate on “Regionalism Vs Nationalism” in the aftermath of a sickening statement by a morally retarded politician and followed violence against a particular community (termed “North Indians” this time ). Kudos! I said. One more good reason to divide the country when we are all shouting this widely spelled term called “Globalization” at the peak of our voices. And why do we feel attacked and assaulted when someone calls us “Racist”? (The recent Harbhajan - Symonds episode)…. We are “Racists”! …. And we are proud to be so … It’s just that we are not ready to accept but it has been our legacy.

I do not know the precise definition of “Racism” but basically it’s “discrimination or prejudice based on race”. Recently, I was introduced by one of my friends to a group of his friends with a rather unintentional teasing remark in the end that “he is a Bihari”. Well! Of course I am … but I was not able to appreciate this comment at that point of time. It’s absolutely not that I do not feel pride in my roots. It’s also not that I want to skip out of an image of a common “Bihari” and turn sophisticated. It’s just that I expect someone to use this term with a degree of respect which to my utter dismay I have never been able to realize in practical experiences. And let’s face it! “Bihari” is an abuse which is widely used by a bunch of arrogant and irrational people living in some of these metros for taxi-drivers and hawkers who according to them have dirtied their land and should be kicked out for a better and healthier social living. And did I say just a bunch of supercilious people? Well there are a few intellectuals as well who have very well turned on national debates in the past. Khuswant Singh, the well known author who had resigned his Rajya Sabha seat after “Operation Blue-Star” is definitely not a clown. His comment that people from Bihar and UP are spoiling Punjab had been a cause of discussion in parliament. And there are numerous such instances to quote. Mohammad Azharuddin, the ex-Indian captain once reacted saying “Biharis are thieves” on getting his cap stolen by a fan while playing a cricket match in Jamshedpur. Ironically, he himself ended up betraying his country in match-fixing episodes turning out to be a traitor. And I definitely need not mention what keeps on happening in Assam and Maharashtra.

I have had experiences of my encounter with this highly opinionated class of people. All they think is Biharis are rough, rude and ill-mannered people who drive taxis or own foot-path shops in Delhi and Mumbai with the exception of a few who crack civil services or become politicians. And that’s what they think about Bihar as well. And all the time I hear these people showing disrespect to the terms “Bihari” and “Bihar”, my heart yearns in pain and I feel like attacked personally. Am I not polished and understated like them? Yes I am …. Can’t I speak good English? Forget it … I have seen lots of them exhibiting their sickening sense of the language at public places in these metros just because they have to show off ( the good old aphorism ..”All that is English is rich and civilized”), Am I not educated? Well! I am a software engineer with Microsoft... Do I need to mention more? At all these occasions I feel like racially abused the same way an average Indian feels when ill-treated on a foreign land. In fact, what Bihar is on the map of India, is India on the world-map. How does it feel like to an average Indian when Mr. L.K. Advani or bollywood actor Bipasha Basu is ill-treated in US and when Punjabis in Canada are abused and insulted, the Canadian government recently banning the use of “Kaur” as surname being an example? And do you know why we are insulted? We, as Indians are insulted for the same reason you insult a Bihari in India - for grabbing away jobs, for driving cabs and for owning shops and dhabas. India and Indians have a rich culture. Agree! Remember Manoj Kumar singing that song in the movie “Purab aur Paschim”, ”Zero diya mere Bharat ne, Duniya Ko Tab Ginti Aayi “……. you feel Proud to listen to the song.. Isn’t it? So the next time you feel like abusing “Bihar” and “Biharis” , better take into account these facts:

· Three major religions of this world have flourished in Bihar namely Buddhism, Jainism and Sikhism. Patna is the birthplace of Guru-Govind Singhji … ( Khushwant Singh should better know this) . Buddha had got his enlightenment in BodhGaya, Buddhism being the fourth largest religion in the world. Mahavira, the founder of Jainism was born in Vaishali , Bihar.
· Modern Bihar has originated from the kingdom of ‘Magdha’ where the Guptas and Mauryas ruled during the “Golden age of ancient Indian History”. Famous mathematicians like Aryabhatta and “Bhaskara”( who invented numerology and “Zero”) studied and researched in Patliputra in the dying years of Gupta Empire.
· “Nalanda University” situated in Bihar is the oldest university of the world where students from the whole of Central and East Asia came to study some 1600 years ago. Chinese travelers “Fa-Hien” and “Huen-Tsang” who came to study here have left the only scripted proof of the “Maurya Dynasty”.
· Undivided Bihar (comprising of Jharkhad) had most of the mineral resources this country has. So all those arrogant fools who think Biharis are eating away their resources in Mumbai and Delhi should better study some economics that how they are benefiting from the resources Bihar is providing to the country. But why would they? I know many of them who eat biryani in a five star hotel without knowing that rice is grown in the farms.
· Do you know that the first president of India Dr. Rajendra Prasad was from Bihar? And that the nationalist movements in India started with the “Champaran Movement” in Bihar. And that Bihar has been the center of these nationalist movements ever since (JP’s Movement)? And that it’s a land of great Hindi poets like Ramdhari Singh Dinkar and Nagarjun? Well better do not know because every time you make a racist remark against “Bihar”, you are abusing these great people.

It’s true that the recent politics in the state and the land disputes have left people jobless and deprived, violence due to caste disputes has resulted into a degraded civic sense but that is mostly due to illiteracy and poverty. And I can give lot of statistics to prove that Delhi tops in the count of rapists and women assaulters. So, the so called civilized people, please stop acting like you are the only ones whoe deserve to live in these big cities,, and next time you shout “racism” on getting your ass kicked in US or Canada, think how ill-behaved you are to the people back home. Stop abusing “Poor and illiterates” ……. This too is “RACISM”.